Tuesday, November 26, 2013

The mental side of resurrection...

I wrote this in January 2012, but never published it.  This gives you a glimpse into the mindset I was beset with:

The mental side of this experience has put me off balance, almost like I have some sort of vertigo in my brain/thought process.  I am easily flustered, easily discouraged, easily distracted by thoughts of the tornado or "worst case scenario" in whatever it is I am doing.  For example, I was driving part way across the country with my kids in December 2011 and had to fight to keep my mind from "seeing" us in a horrible auto accident and then picturing how I would save all the kids.  Then the thought pops up, "You can out-live all the disasters in the world.  Eventually one of them will kill you and your children."  I've been in earthquakes (thank you, California childhood), mild hurricanes (thank you, Florida panhandle college years), and my house in OH was struck by lightening last year.  How much more can I expect to survive?

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